Neediness. Emotional drama. Struggles for power with intermittent periods of peace and reconciliation dominate many relationships.
We're looking to heal our hurt. Our trauma. We're hoping and praying somebody else will make us feel OK and secure.
Trauma creates external seeking of the sort. We're looking for a fix, through others. The strategy is based in not knowing any better way.
We have to wonder what the ultimate trauma is, or was. Yes, it's our stories but it goes deeper than that. Much deeper.
It's really the forgetfulness that results from birth and forgetting where you came from—i.e., what and who you are.
This is how we move from lost to found. By remembering, through pain. And seeking through others always causes pain.